String Theory
by thoughtlessCoffee
Summary: "The mathematics suggest the world we know is not complete. In addition to our four dimensions: three-dimensional space and time, the theory predicts the existence of hidden dimensions curled in tiny geometric shapes at every single point in our universe." Sequel to When Worlds Collide. Headcanons, a self-insert, and science-y stuff involved!
1. Facts About the Warden

**FACTS ABOUT THE WARDEN OF SUPERJAIL  
** _His favorite color is purple._  
_His favorite musician is David Bowie._  
_His favorite movie is The Yellow Submarine._  
_He's not the best at spelling._  
_Or art._  
_He can't stand the taste of bananas._

I paused before adding one last bullet.

_He's an asshole._

I scanned over what I had written so far. Sometimes it was a little strange to remember my time in Superjail. I tried not to think about it too much, though. If you think about things like that it'll make you crazy. So I was writing down things I wanted to remember.

The Warden was certainly the most memorable part of my adventure.

I had some facts I had picked up from Alice and Jared's gossip. The Warden always dressed in purple. He would waltz around singing David Bowie songs. He stayed up late almost four times a week to watch the Yellow Submarine. His spelling wasn't quite as good as it could be. I had seen his art before, and it was cute in a way a three year old's art would be, if the three year old had been on a bad acid trip, and the drawings mainly consisted of Jared being maimed.

The last fact was just obvious.

I turned towards the drawer in which I had stuffed the directions to get back to Superjail in. To be honest, I missed everyone there. (Well, mostly everyone.) I weighed my options for a moment before grabbing my notebook. I took out the old paper and sighed. "This better be worth it..."

"Whoa, rad." I said as I was swallowed by a colorful portal.


	2. Welcome Back!

Oh man oh man oh man  
Okay so this is the sequel to When Worlds Collide and it kinda explains some of the crazy stuff Warden is able to do...if that makes sense? I read about string theory when I was eight or nine and I thought it sounded really fascinating. I mean, hidden dimensions and stuff? That's freaking rad! Anyways, I won't bore you with my life story, so basically, the science-y side of me thought that hidden dimensions fit really well into Superjail...and that could explain a LOT. Here's chapter two, guys!

* * *

I landed smack in the center of the Warden's office. "Ow! Fuck!" I yelled. He whirled around in his chair. "Who..."

"Relax!" I said, still in the floor. "It's me. Becky. The fifteen year old who you tried to hire as a maid."

"Oh, you!" he said, getting up and walking over to me. "Yes, I remember you. You filled up your swear jar pretty quickly."

The Warden extended his hand. I grabbed it and he gently but firmly pulled me to my feet. He walked back and sat in his desk chair, and invited me a seat on the table. "So why are you here?" he asked, rather bluntly.

"Um." I answered. "I just kinda missed you guys. And I'm broke. And I wanna ask you some stu-"

"Broke?" he asked. "I can help with that. I'm loaded, you know, running a place like this. I can get you a job here, and starting pay will be-"

"Ohh no." It was my turn to cut him off. "NO. You remember what happened last time I worked for you? Go find another teenage girl if you want a maid."

"That's not what I was going to say." he said condescendingly. I rolled my eyes. "We can talk about this. Do you have any talents?"

"Well...I can draw, I can play a guitar, I'm good at listening to people..."

The Warden snapped his fingers. "Great! How about weaknesses?"

"I have a short temper, I can't sing, I'm blunt, and I can't skateboard."

"We don't need a band...what job requires listening to people?" The Warden wondered.

"A lot." I concluded.

"What about a therapist?" he asked suddenly. "Lots of inmates could use a few kind words and some professional help."

"Professional?" I yelled. "I'm a high school sophomore!"

"Good enough." the Warden said. He began to shoo her out. "We can share a room for now. Go find something nice to wear, and we'll start you off."

I grumbled. Getting answers to my questions was going to be a lot harder than I had thought before.


	3. Steam Burn

"Ouch!" I shrieked as a hot cloud washed over the room. "Oh Jesus, that burns!"

"Sorry." Ash rasped, huddled up in a chair in the small office the Warden had set up for me. "I cry steam."

"I didn't think it would be that hot!" I yelped, desperately trying to open a window. I managed to slide it open (slamming my fingers in the process) and let some cool air in. "Okay. That's better. Kind of. Just calm down." I advised.

I pulled back my sleeve and examined a steam burn on my forearm. "Ummmm...Ash." I said, trying to connect my injury to his emotional problems. He looked up at me expectantly.

"Uh...when you...express...negative feelings like that, er, sometimes it can hurt other people." I did my best to sound professional. "Look. You cried and it made steam and it burned me. Now we're both hurting. This is the kind of thing we need to w-"

I paused as I heard footsteps. "Oh crap!" I snapped into action, ushering Ash out the door. "What's going on?" he worried. "It's okay. It's just the Warden coming to bother me. I'll come visit you in your cell this evening."

I sent Ash on his way and rushed back into my office. Unfortunately, I slipped on some stray papers and went flying, landing upside down in my chair when the Warden strolled in. "Business looks great." he smirked at me. Then he tugged in his collar a little. "Damn, it's hot in here."

"Ash was just here."

"Ah."

"So what are you in here for?" I asked.

"I just came to make sure you were doing okay. Is there anything you need?"

"Ummm...can I ask you some questions?" I tried.

Much to my surprise, the Warden's face lit up. "Like an interview?"

"Er...kind of. It's more like, a family history interview."

"Can I interview you?" he asked excitedly.

"Well...I suppose."

The Warden giggled like a weeaboo as he opened up my notebook to a blank page.


	4. Facts About Becky

Aaaaa sorry for not updating! I got grounded for a bit, so that meant no computer u-u But now I'm back! Yay! And here's chapter four...

* * *

"Favorite color?"

"Teal."

"Favorite musician?"

"Gwen Stefani. But only her 90's stuff, really."

"Favorite movie."

"The Rocky Horror Picture Show."

The Warden grinned. "You really haven't changed much! Hot 90's blonde ska singers...crossdressing aliens..." I rolled my eyes a little but smiled. "I kinda feel like that would be your kind of movie. You must like it, right?" I asked. I figured that if he wasn't into it, he would at least like the music.

"Actually..." he said slowly. "I haven't seen it..."

"What?" I ripped the notebook out of his hands. "Come on. You NEED to watch it." I said as I dragged him out of the room.


	5. Homework

I yawned, staring at the half-full, half-empty document on my laptop. It had been two days since I had watched the Rocky Horror Picture Show with the Warden, and he was still tap dancing around everywhere. Meanwhile, I figured since time was frozen back home and I hadn't done any homework, like the lazy fuck I am, I could at least TRY to get it done.

I breezed through my Physics and Biology worksheets and finished the short story we had to read for English fairly quickly. I ended up struggling with my Geometry homework and it took an hour to finish, even with Jared's help.

Now, I was busily typing up an essay on the Voynich Manuscript for my History class. I'll admit it, I'm a total archaeology geek. When I was six I wanted to be a paleontologist, when I was seven I wanted to dig up old corpses, and when I was eight, I wanted to be an archaeologist so I could have awesome, action packed adventures. But now, I mostly read about and studied ancient mysteries like this, and the Voynich Manuscript was a freakin' gold mine. This is the stuff that gets Indiana Jones rock hard.

By my side sat an empty cup which had, about an hour ago, held fruit parfait (courtesy of Jailbot), a stack of books on the essay subject (courtesy of Jared), and a box of candies (courtesy of Alice). I was chugging along with my essay, almost horny from the total radness of it, when suddenly the Warden burst in.

"Heeeeeeeeeeey Becky~!" he sang, tip-tapping around the room, though his dress shoes made it sound more like a clip-clop.

"Ugh...hi..." I closed my laptop and rolled my eyes at him.

"Hungry?" he asked, eyeing the junk food on my desk.

"Actually, yes! This is all I've eaten today."

"Great!" he said, grabbing my arm. "Let's gooo~!"

"Wait! Where are we going?" I exclaimed.

"We're going to go eat dinner! I made it myself!"

I facepalmed with my free hand. Oh no...


	6. Dinner

"So what did you make?" I asked, following the Warden to wherever we were going.

"Oh, nothing special..." he said modestly. I found myself praying that it wouldn't be something crazy, or even worse, something that could get me sick. He pushed open the door to a huge room with a long table. And on the table was a ton of candy! It was just sitting in piles on the tabletop, every kind imaginable!

"This is dinner?" I asked. "Hmm? This is dessert." the Warden answered. He pointed at two large plates with food on them on each side of the table. "That's dinner." I smiled awkwardly and made the long walk to my end of the table. On the plate sat a meal that looked totally amazing.

It consisted of a good-sized piece of awesome looking steak (I mean like the REALLY awesome steak you get at Texas Roadhouse), some creamy, buttery mashed potatoes (I am a total sucker for any form of potato, especially mashed potatoes), and to the side there was a bowl filled with eggs and ramen. The Warden had already dug into his food, and he seemed to be immensely proud of himself.

"You made this yourself?" I asked.

"What?" he called down the long table.

"I said, you made this yourself?" I shouted.

"Yeah! I had some outside help though."

I sat down and we tried to have a normal conversation, but the distance between us was too great. So I simply gathered my things and sat down next to the Warden. "Much better." We both said, this time in a normal tone. We had a normal chat, just the usual catching up. "How's your schoolwork?" he asked. I sighed. "I'm almost done. I'm total shit at Geometry, though." The Warden smiled. "Yeah, I hate math. That's why I have Jared do it all for me!"

Soon we were done with dinner. The Warden clapped his hands cheerfully. "Desseeeert!" he squealed. He jumped onto the table and practically inhaled a good chunk of the candy. I, on the other hand, was still in my chair, trying to recuperate from the huge meal. "Ohh man, I'm gonna be waddling back to my room..." I complained. The Warden lifted me up and spun me in the air. I nearly threw up on him. "Come on, Becky!" he chirped. He unwrapped an Airhead and lifted it to my lips. "Yoooou can't resiiiiiiiiist~" he sang. I tried to bite his finger, but at the last second he shoved the candy into my mouth. "Oh god, no more food..." I grumbled, falling from his arms to the floor.

Before I hit the floor, I realized my surroundings were becoming quite psychedelic.


	7. Superjail Manufactured

Sorry for not updating sooner guys! Last weekend Shoe and I went to the lake, and I would have updated yesterday, but Hayden and I went out to the movies and for dinner and we didn't get back home till about half past midnight, so now's my chance to update! Here's chapter seveeen

* * *

"Dude, what is in this candy?" I asked, still sprawled out on the floor. The Warden picked up the wrapper and began to read it in hopes of making a sarcastic response. "Sugar, Corn Syrup, Maltodextrin, Dextr..." his voice trailed off suddenly. "Wait, these aren't real Airheads...these are Superjail manufactured Airheads!"

I could have thrown up. I staggered to my feet, dizzy, and grabbed a "Laffy Taffy" from the table. Upon close examination, the trademark Wonka hat was changed to the Warden's hat. I wondered what jokes were on the wrapper. I turned it around and quickly read the question.

_What's small, nervous, and sucks?_

I lifted the flap.

_Jared._

Okay, I admit it. That was actually pretty funny. Honestly, Jared's really nice, but the Warden's humor (at least in my drugged-up state) was hilarious. I couldn't help but let a small giggle slip. The Warden grinned and grabbed the wrapper. He read it quickly, then threw his head back and laughed hysterically. "The best one!" he squealed. Then he grabbed my hand. "Let's go!"

We dashed through the halls, off to create more chaos...


	8. The Part Where the Warden Gets Naked

I woke up, naked, with the Warden, also naked, in my bed.

I screamed, causing Jailbot to crash through the walls to see if I was alright. I leaped out of the bed, covering myself with a sheet, and locked myself in the bathroom. "What's she so scared about?" I heard the Warden ask. I poked my head out the door. "Get out!" I screeched.

"It's not like we did anything..." he said. "Then why are we naked and in my bed?" I demanded. He shrugged. I rolled my eyes, and watched as he left the room. Then I rolled back into bed.

I found the warm spot where the Warden had been sleeping, closed my eyes, and went back to sleep.


	9. History of the Warden

"How?"

"Hmm?"

"How?" I repeated.

"How what?"

"How do you do all this stuff?" I demanded. "Like shapeshifting and teleporting and all that."

The Warden looked up at me from his desk. Then he got up and stood next to me. I only came up to just under his shoulder (yeah, I'm real short) and he looked down at me. "Do you really want to know?"

"Yeah."

He bit his lip before beginning. "Well...I suppose I should start with some history. I was born to a rich family, and my mother died when I was really little. I think she got sick. I had to suffer at the hands of my abusive father for a few years until he died too, then I was raised by one of his servants, and when I was eighteen I took control of the jail. But it was just so bland, and I hated it."

"What happened to that jail?" I asked.

He smiled a little. "You're in it right now."

I looked around. "How long has it been like this?"

"When I was nineteen I started working on plans for rebuilding the jail my way, but it wasn't finished until my twenty-second birthday nine years ago." he told me. I looked around, amazed. "It's only been like this for nine years?"

The Warden nodded. "I have another question though. You weren't born named 'The Warden', were you?" I asked.

He bit his lip again. "My name is-"

Suddenly, as if someone evil wanted to ruin the moment (like me), Jared burst in. "SIR!" he yelled. The Warden exploded. "JESUS FUCK JARED, I'M ABOUT TO REVEAL A VITAL SECRET! GET LOST!"

Jared scampered off.

"You were saying?" I continued.

The Warden smiled. "My name is David. And that's where the history ends, and the mystery begins."


	10. String Theory

After I smacked the Warden for his stupid joke, we sat on the floor together drinking soda, engaged in a bloody battle of Chutes and Ladders. After I beat him twice and he beat me four times, and we were starting on our next game when I asked, "So how do you do all that magic stuff?"

"Well it's not really magic," the Warden said. "Ever heard of the string theory?"

I looked up at him. "Yeah...what about it?"

"It's said that we can never access and understand any of the nineteen dimensions that our not our own. It's impossible for everyone."

I nodded.

"Except me."

I swallowed a huge gulp of soda. The fizzing sensation in my throat made me cough and choke violently until the Warden smacked my back. "So you can manipulate reality?" I sputtered. He nodded and smiled. "You've seen it!"

"But how?" I asked. He shrugged. "Actually...I'm not really sure. It just started when I was about your age. I've learned to live with it."

I didn't respond as he moved three spaces and won our seventh game.


End file.
